Weekly Rec: Lady Bird

You probably don't need me to tell you that Lady Bird is a great movie. It's getting lots of raves and beating Rotten Tomatoes records and whatnot, but apparently I liked it enough that I feel the need to say: It really is that good! (I'm always skeptical of things with lots of hype. Maybe you are too. But then I guess I'm adding to the hype rather than reassuring you. Oops.)

Lady Bird, written and directed by Greta Gerwig and starring Saoirse Ronan, is a coming-of-age story of a high school senior in Sacramento in the 2002-03 school year. She's determinedly weird and artistic and chafes against what she sees as the limitations imposed by her Catholic school and working class family. She falls in love. She tries out for the school play. She applies to colleges. She fights with her mother and her best friend. That sounds boring, but it's exquisite and authentic. I'm a few years older than the protagonist, close enough that almost all the references felt directly taken from my late high school and college years: The too-cool boy reading Howard Zinn. The Sondheim. The cloves. The Dave Matthews song.

And yet, beyond all those specifics, Lady Bird manages to feel true on a universal level. Even if the details are different, the incredible and agonizing process of growing up and figuring out who you are and how you relate to your family and friends and the world resonates with a lot of people. And even if you're not particularly interested in those themes, it's just a well-made film: The writing and acting and production design and everything are precise and excellent. (I went with my dad. He has never been a teen girl, but he loved it too.)

Lady Bird is currently in wide release. Go see it!

(Weekly recommendations made possible by my wonderful Patreon supporters!)

Friday, November 24, 2017

Weekly Rec: In for a Penny by Rose Lerner

Regency romances were among the first romance novels I read, because my mother read them, but I'd sort of drifted away from them in recent years for no particular reason. And then a few weeks ago, Rose Lerner rereleased her first book, In for a Penny, and a whole bunch of people I follow on Twitter whose tastes I trust recommended it. I bought the Kindle version, read it on vacation last week, and enjoyed it so much that I started wondering why I'd stopped reading Regencies in the first place. Really, I'm not sure there's higher praise than "made me want to read a bunch more of its genre."

Quick background for those unfamiliar: the "Regency" in Regency romance technically refers to Great Britain between 1811 and 1820, when the future George IV ruled as Prince Regent for his father King George III, who had been deemed unfit to rule. In a cultural sense, the term is often used more broadly, encompassing from the late 1790s until the beginning of the Victorian era in 1837. When it comes to romance novels, this is one of the most popular settings, and it means books set roughly in the world of Jane Austen. They've often taken the standard form of lords and ladies falling in love in ballrooms, but some writers are doing some new and interesting things in the genre. (You could say that about any genre, really. They all have good and bad and mediocre.)

In this one, the hero is an immature aristocratic rake who needs to reform after the sudden death of his father (and the discovery of his father's debts), and the heroine is an extremely practical and competent new money heiress. He proposes to her because he needs to marry a fortune to keep his family's estate intact, but it turns out that she's also very good at math and making lists and he's SO INTO IT. Together they set out to turn his estate profitable again, and they end up encountering the social change that results from the changing agricultural methods of the time.

This book incorporates a lot of tropes - most prominently the marriage of convenience in which both parties secretly fall in love with their spouse - but that's one of my favorites when it's well-deployed, which it is here. There's a fair amount of melodrama, but the fresh and interesting characters balance it well. And I LOVE when romances deal frankly with the class system and other historical issues and make their landed gentry actually deal with their positions, rather than just go to parties all the time. This was a total delight to read and would make a great introduction to the genre.

Morning Coffee (11/24/17)

It's Friday! I keep forgetting that because it feels like, I don't know, Sunday. But it's time for happy Friday links!

The Times has posted its 100 Notable Books of 2017, and I've read... four so far, which is actually better than I often do.

This Jessica Chastain profile is delightfully feminist. (And has an amazing feminist quote from Aaron Sorkin!)

An Unabashed Appreciation of Smitten Kitchen, the Ur-Food Blog

What makes Murder on the Orient Express’s iconic ending work so well

One of my favorites: Escape the News with the British Podcast “In Our Time with Melvyn Bragg”

5 YA Books For When You Can’t Get Enough Hallmark Christmas Movies

I'm not sure I've tried this but this made me want to: Starbucks Snickerdoodle Hot Chocolate Is the Reason for the Season

YES PLEASE: This Sprawling Bookstore in a Former Church Will Have You Planning a Trip to Scotland

Hottest Heads of State made dioramas for their history candles and it's amazing.

Aww, Josh Malina.

Thursday, November 23, 2017

Morning Coffee (11/23/17)

Happy Thanksgiving! I've got all Thanksgiving-themed links for you today, and then we're going to a weekend link schedule today/tomorrow - morning links only. (But check back tomorrow afternoon too because I'll recommend, uh, something. Suspense!)

This is basically my ideal Thanksgiving read: Hard Times at Plimoth Plantation

USEFUL ADVICE: How to Cook in Someone Else's Kitchen

I look forward to this post of Alyssa's every Thanksgiving because I, too, love tradition.

The Times has a great set of Thanksgiving essays by a variety of accomplished writers: My Thanksgiving

Here's the deal with all those turkeys terrorizing the suburbs

Americans are desperately seeking ham shops and other Thanksgiving Google-search revelations

9 Pop Culture Picks to Get You Through Thanksgiving

Tofurky: A Brief, Semi-Accidental History of Thanksgiving’s Fake Meat

Filling a Turkey With Molten Aluminum Is a Terrible Way to Cook Thanksgiving Dinner

How Pumpkin Pie Sparked a 19th-Century Culture War

How to Host (or Be) a Vegetarian at a Holiday Meal

So you're having a vegetarian over for Thanksgiving or Christmas or some other festive meal! Or you're a vegetarian going to someone else's house! This does not have to be difficult or stressful for either side. I promise. A few tips:

Be considerate. Really, this is the most important holiday/life tip for ANYONE. But just keeping other people's feelings and needs in mind will go a long way. Hosts: You don't have to learn new ways of cooking or anything, but just make sure a few dishes have no meat. Guests: Don't make a fuss or recoil in horror from the turkey or anything. I count it as a success when no one has really noticed what I was or wasn't eating.

Remember that it's just one meal. Hosts: Don't go crazy trying to provide a giant balanced meal. Just make sure that there are a few things your vegetarian can eat. If you have mashed potatoes and/or bread and don't put meat in all your vegetable sides, you're probably there already. And guests: You will live without a protein or whatever. It's one meal. You can eat salad or veggie sides and bread and dessert and you'll probably be fine for a few hours until you can go home and eat whatever you want. (Obviously, if you're hosting a vegetarian houseguest for a few days, it's worth having a bigger conversation!)

Okay, let's talk about communication for a moment. A few related tips:
  1. Hosts: If you're planning to thoughtfully make something for the vegetarian(s) that you don't think others will eat, check with them first as to whether they want that particular thing. For example: I don't much care for eggplant. I'd rather eat salad and bread for a meal than make myself choke down an eggplant dish to be polite while feeling guilty that someone went to the trouble to make it for me.
  2. Vegetarians: If you want something specific, offer to make and bring it. Vegetarian stuffing and gravy is a good example here.
  3. Remember that there are various levels of vegetarianism, and ask if you're not sure what someone will eat. For example: My vegetarianism ends at marshmallows.
  4. Vegetarians: It's okay to ask what's in things if you need to, but try not to be annoying about it or bother the host when they're trying to do a million things. At holiday events, I usually have my mom try things for me if possible and let me know if they seem safe, and only ask if I really need to, and try to let it go rather than grill people about whether there might be a little chicken stock in something. (In restaurants, I ask all the time because I'm paying them to feed me.)
  5. Hosts: Try to see such inquiries as a simple request for information rather than a complaint or value judgment.
  6. Everyone: If you're bringing a dish to a potluck or anywhere where you don't know some of the people you're eating with, consider just labeling it with the ingredients so no one has to hunt down who made what to ask. Vegetarians, people with food allergies, and picky eaters will all thank you.
  7. DON'T LIE. Seriously. Lying to someone about what is in their food is a bad idea for all sorts of reasons.

Don't take it too personally. Hosts: Vegetarians are not declining to eat meat in order to offend you. Guests: People are not serving meat in order to offend you, and MOST of the time when people don't provide anything you can eat it's an error of thoughtlessness or ignorance rather than deliberate exclusion. Everyone: What other people eat isn't about you. Try not to take it as a personal attack.

Don't proselytize or harangue or tease, either of you. Vegetarians: No one enjoying their Thanksgiving dinner wants to be told your reasons for not eating meat (unless they ask, I guess). And seriously, don't try to shame people. You're ruining it for the rest of us. Meat eaters: No vegetarian has ever been convinced to eat meat by being teased or yelled at in front of a group of people. I promise. If you must, treat it like any other slightly weird personality trait that does not actually affect you in the slightest.

And remember: It doesn't have to be about the food. At least in theory, holidays are about spending time with people you love! If you keep that in mind, it's easier not to get stressed out about what anyone's eating or not eating. Have fun!

Morning Coffee (11/21/17)

Back from vacation! If you missed any posts because I wasn't able to link them on Facebook, just click on my name at the top to go to the home page and scroll down.

Me elsewhere: TV news for the week.

I've been working on this anthology for months and I'm so excited for you all to read it: Rosie O'Donnell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and others contribute to new anthology How I Resist

I mean... true: North Korea’s latest tirade: Trump is a ‘mean trickster and human reject’

Of course: F.C.C. Is Said to Plan Repeal of Net Neutrality Rules

This is impressive work by Laura McGann - to tell her own story and do good reporting simultaneously: Exclusive: NYT White House correspondent Glenn Thrush’s history of bad judgment around young women journalists

Good for them for coordinating and coming forward on this. This guy sounds TERRIBLE: ‘One Tree Hill’ Cast, Crew Detail Assault, Harassment Claims Against Mark Schwahn

Rare genetic mutation found in Amish community could combat ageing

Ooh: BritBox to Offer Near-Simulcasts, "BritMas" Content for Holiday Season

YouTube drama is so much fun: YouTube Personality Zoella Draws Heat for Overpriced Advent Calendar (?)

Why Wounds Heal Faster During the Day Than at Night

Monday, November 20, 2017

Afternoon Tea (11/20/17)

I'm traveling and compiled and scheduled this post in advance, so WHO KNOWS what's actually going on in the world by now. Back on Tuesday!

I'm often skeptical of celebrity authors but I'm excited to read this book: Krysten Ritter Spins Her Own Mystery in Her Debut Novel, ‘Bonfire’

It's almost Advent calendar time and Smart Bitches has a roundup of some great ones.

These are DELIGHTFUL: Celebrities at the Airport in the 1970s: The Photos

The Complicated Political Lives of Medieval Manuscripts

This Week I Wanna Dress Like: Maude From ‘Harold and Maude’ (I mean, who doesn't?)

Friday, November 17, 2017

Afternoon Tea (11/17/17)

I'm traveling and compiled and scheduled this post in advance, so WHO KNOWS what's actually going on in the world by now. Back on Tuesday!

Trust me, you want to read this follow-up to the profile I posted yesterday: 15 Things You Learn While Hanging Out With Armie Hammer

I'm PRETTY EXCITED that Patty Jenkins and Chris Pine are making a 1960s noir show together and this interview with their DP is interesting.

The Forgotten Lifestyle Star Who Taught Women of the 1930s How to 'Live Alone and Like It'

A Remote Shetland Island Could Become a Spaceport

What We Can Learn From Multiple Translations of the Same Poem

Morning Coffee (11/17/17)

This week's Happy Friday links have a lot of Go Fug Yourself but I'm not actually sorry, unless any of you already read their site faithfully and thus have fewer new things to read here.

This is wonderful: Barbie Debuts a Hijab, Thanks to Ibtihaj Muhammad

Chelsea Clinton announces international companion to She Persisted children's book

This is both funny and thoughtful, even if you don't care about Blake Shelton: Blake Shelton Is People’s Sexiest Man Alive? (Real talk: Blake Shelton is not even the sexiest man alive ON HIS OWN TV SHOW, though his reaction quoted in that piece made me like him a little better than I had.)

!!!! 280-Character Tweets Make Tetris Possible on Twitter

Titanic to return to theaters for 20th anniversary (This briefly sent me spiraling because my friend and I went to see it for an anniversary release ALREADY and that CANNOT have been ten years ago, but no, it was FIVE years ago. Are they going to re-release it every five years? This is not necessarily a complaint.)

This happened at the end of LAST week but I wanted to make sure you saw because it's important: Tom Hiddleston Is Literally Walking Around London Cradling a Puppy

Let's go to Italy's new food theme park.

USEFUL and also funny: How to Pluralize Your Last Name on Holiday Cards

Three Gorgeous Cakes for the Holidays

SPARKLY SHOES. (I just got sparkly shoes on clearance for $13 and I'm obsessed and need you all to invite me to holiday parties so I can wear them.)

Weekly Rec: Trader Joe's Cornbread Crisps

The world is terrible so we're just going to talk about snack food today, okay? Specifically: Trader Joe's Cornbread Crisps. They are astonishingly good, somewhere between chips and crackers. My friends raved about them so much that I bought two bags, and then I went back and bought three more (but two of those are for Thanksgiving, I swear).


They SEEM to be what would happen if you cut up dense cornbread into tiny slices and added some salt and maybe butter and toasted them, except I'm 100% sure that if I actually tried to do that myself I'd just wind up with a mess of cornbread crumbs. So it's worth risking your life in the Trader Joe's parking lot to obtain these, I promise.

NOTE: From my friends' descriptions, I'd expected them to be in a box, shelved with crackers. THEY ARE NOT. They are in a bag in the chip section.


You can eat them alone. With cheese. In soup! With chili. I'm bringing some to Thanksgiving and I think they will make a great seasonally-appropriate chip substitute for before the meal.

Also note: Trader Joe's did not, alas, pay me to endorse their product. I just feel strongly about spreading the gospel of Cornbread Crisps. But YOU can help pay me for writing future ridiculous posts like this by joining me on Patreon!

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Afternoon Tea (11/14/17)

This is fascinating and this book immediately went onto my Christmas list: The First Woman to Translate the ‘Odyssey’ Into English

Aww, my friend Tim! Shopping for a Life He Didn’t Yet Have

The Secret History of Cricket Magazine, the ‘New Yorker for Children’

I wish to read a romance novel series about these brothers immediately: When He Needs Advice, a Philadelphia Flyer Turns to His Brother the Dancer

The Ancient Roman Cult That Continues to Vex Scholars (The Precession of the Equinox takes down another copyeditor, I see.)

In defense of just letting yourself like things sometimes

Taylor Swift has a new album out. You may have heard.

More to the point, you may have seen the million Hot Takes by Very Cool People about how Swift is evil for wanting to make money from her work and her image. How carefully constructing the product that she's selling - by which I mean both her album and her public persona - makes her, somehow, a bad person. How with everything else going on in the world, apparently what we should be worrying about is appropriately punishing a woman who dares to write song lyrics about a man who wrote song lyrics about her.

I don't think Taylor Swift is A PERFECT PERSON or anything - tip: life gets much easier when you stop expecting anyone to be perfect - but I'm a fan. I enjoy both her music and her determination to control her own narrative. And I have all the counterarguments and refutations ready to go, about how male and female lyricists are held to crazily different standards (because men NEVER write songs about their love lives, right????), about how it's wrong to support a system in general and castigate one person for operating profitably within it, about how I like her because she's calculating. But honestly? I just don't want to.

In another world, I can absolutely see myself writing a defense of Swift much longer than any of you would actually want to read, and finding that pretty satisfying. In this world, we are pretty busy defending statements like "Nazis are bad" and "30-year-olds shouldn't date high schoolers" and "People who have never been members of a political party shouldn't be given control of it", so I just don't have the energy. And so I'm giving myself the gift of not reading any of the Hot Takes this time, of scrolling past all the tweets from my friends about how Taylor is evil and her fans are stupid. Sure. Fine. Whatever.

I'm giving myself the gift of just listening to Reputation over and over in my car, letting myself be amused and comforted and inspired by the lyrics, singing along because it's fun and God knows we need some fun right now. And it's okay. The world will not end because I decide to sit out the argument this time. Take some time to just like something that makes you happy. It will be good for you.

(For more content, join me on Patreon!)

Weekly Rec: MoviePass

MoviePass has been getting a lot of press lately, since they dropped their prices, so this isn't exactly a recommendation of something unknown, but I've seen a lot of "Is this a scam? Does it work? What's the catch?" going around, so I figured I'd tell you about my experience with it:

It is not a scam! It works! I have not been able to find a catch!

The deal: Membership is $9.95 a month. (Month by month. You can cancel whenever.) With that you can see up to one standard 2D movie a day at pretty much any movie theater that takes debit cards. (AMC has made noises about blocking them, but has not been successful - I used it there last week.) They send you what looks like a debit card, and you also have to install an app. When you arrive at the theater, you select the movie you want to see from the app, and then you go buy your ticket normally, just "paying" with the MoviePass card instead of a regular card. It's like magic.

So yes, there are a few limitations - it's only one movie per day, no 3D or IMAX or other special stuff, and you have to buy your ticket that day at the theater, so you can't buy it online in advance or whatever. But even with those caveats: membership pays for itself if you see at least one movie a month, and it's a good deal if you see as few as two. If you're someone who goes to a lot of movies, it's a GREAT deal.

(One note as to their business model, since people have been asking: They are owned by a data company. They are doing this to get your viewing data. That's how they can make it so cheap. So you can decide that's worth it to you or not, obviously. Personally, I don't really care. But I guess that's the "catch," if you see it that way.)

What I'm really loving about this (other than, you know, saving money) is the sense of FREEDOM it gives me about seeing movies. I no longer have to debate with myself whether any given movie will be worth the price of admission. I can just go see everything! Or, more truthfully, it becomes just a question of debating which movies are worth the TIME investment, but still. Guilt-free movie-going whenever I feel like it is AMAZING.

In related news, I saw The Snowman and it was just as terrible as you've heard and I had a GREAT time.

Please go vote.

Oh hey, happy Election Day!

...yeah. I know. That phrase is bringing up a lot of REALLY UNPLEASANT ASSOCIATIONS for a lot of us right now. It's easier to just not think about it. Sometimes that's NECESSARY if we want to keep functioning. I get that. It's important to take care of yourself, to take a step back when you need to.

Just not today.

Today, staying home is just selfish. "But it's an odd number year!" you say. "Nothing important is on the ballot!" No. That's a lie people have been telling you. Many many places have local elections today, and I know it can be harder to figure out the candidates and issues for these, but in some ways they're the most important elections in which you get to vote.

TWO BIG REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD VOTE IN LOCAL ELECTIONS EVEN IF YOU'D RATHER GO HOME AND HIBERNATE

1. Local elections have huge effects on your life and the people around you. Sure, state and national ones do too, but the more I pay attention to local politics, the more important I realize they are. These elections are the ones that will determine your school system policies and local housing regulations and whether your community spends money on schools or paving the roads or cultural events or nothing at all. If you have ballot questions today, they give you a direct up/down vote on actual policies, without even going through a representative. And the people you elect today are the ones who will vote on the contracts for your kids' teachers and your police and firefighters. They will control things like public works and the parks and rec department. They will be the ones running your next elections, those ones in 2018 and 2020 that have such big stakes.

2. Local politics are how most aspiring national politicians - good or bad - get their start. In many ways, this is a feeder system. Getting elected to local office lets politicians start to build a base that will give them time and attention and money as they then run for higher office. It also provides on-the-job training for the actual work of being an elected representative. Even if you think you don't really care about local issues, I bet you care about having a say in which candidates get the experience and platform they need to be successful in state and national politics.

If you're someone who often feels like the candidates running for Senate or President on the major party tickets don't represent your interests and beliefs, then the absolute most important thing you can do to change that is to help get people you agree with elected in local races. And if you want to stop people you disagree with - like actual Nazis, say - from being in positions of power over the whole country: come out and vote against them when they're trying to take over the school board. It's like being a time traveler going back to prevent terrible things from happening, but easier.

I know you don't want to relive anything that reminds you of last year, or maybe you're frustrated with the whole system and just want to sit this out, but this is too important to let our own personal emotional needs and comfort to outweigh the greater good. Please. Grin and bear it and go vote.

(Post made possible by my Patreon supporters.)

Monday, November 6, 2017

Afternoon Tea (11/6/17)

Fascinating: Greetings From Palau, The Micronesian Archipelago That Baseball Built

The Evolution of Sarah Polley

I missed this a few months ago but it's been in the news because Disney is retaliating by not letting LA Times critics into screenings of their movies for review, and it's worth a read: Is Disney paying its share in Anaheim?

The $10,000 Whisky Dram That Turned Out to Be Worthless

Heh: Put Your Hands Together For Jezebel's Acceptable Things!!!!